AUTISTIC MEME DISORDER

YOU’VE BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH $AMD AUTISTIC MEME DISORDER SYMPTOMS: - Compulsive cryptocurrency chart watching - Inability to resist FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) - Chronic wallet depletion syndrome - Advanced stages of "Diamond Hands" delusion - Severe addiction to Telegram/Discord crypto channels - Spontaneous purchasing of tokens with dog/meme mascots - Complete disregard for basic financial risk management CLINICAL OBSERVATIONS: - Patient exhibits irrational excitement about 0.0000001% chance tokens - Frequent self-induced financial trauma - High tolerance for massive portfolio losses - Tendency to believe random Twitter "influencers" RECOMMENDED TREATMENT: - Cold turkey ban from crypto exchanges - Mandatory financial literacy courses - Blocking all crypto-related social media - Supervised wallet access - Cognitive behavioral therapy focused on investment rationality PROGNOSIS: Potentially terminal to personal finances. Immediate intervention required. Dr. HODL McSoL Memeonomics Department Cryptocurrency Mental Health Center NOTE: No refunds for treatment.